This one’s for you, Brad

When I was in college, my sister and I went skydiving with one of my roommates. We all drove out to a field near Longmont where a Vietnam veteran gave us a quick four-hour session on the dos and don’ts of jumping out of a perfectly good airplane. We avoided going tandem on our very first dive because it was a static line that opened after a few seconds of freefall. Still, we needed to know what to do in case the chute didn’t open automatically, and while I can’t remember the guy’s name, to this day I remember one piece of instruction he gave us. I think it has stuck with me all these years because it is damn good advice in general. “When you’re up there, hanging out enjoying the view,” he said. “If you happen to see a dumpster way down on the ground, whatever you do, do not stare at it, thinking, ‘Gee, I really don’t want to land in that dumpster.”

If you have lived in Carbondale for a spell, this perfectly describes what is going on in our town these days. (The mere fact that I use the word ‘spell’ ought to clear up any confusion as to whom I’m talking about; the middle-aged locals, the folks who have lived here for their middle-of-the-loaf years.) We keep driving by all the new construction, shaking our heads, muttering to ourselves, “when the hell did that happen… I sure hope they stop building us out with this bland suburban sprawl.” Then, next thing we know, there’s an enormous cinderblock wall at the entrance of town. What’s the plan here? Keep Carbondale Ugly?

This was a theory held by beloved Satanker, Brad Hendricks. Brad believed we could keep our town the way it was a little longer by leaving junk cars in the yard, by letting trees and grasses grow wildly, by hanging our laundry out for all to see… Basically, by making our town unsightly, we would keep the fancy-pants from finding out how great it was to live here. Well, Kevin, you can take your underpants off the line now because they’ve figured it out.

I’ve decided Kevin is the male counterpart to Karen (no offense to all the easy-going Kevins out there, who do not shove their-way-or-the-highway down our throats.) Inspired by the Kevins, Brad, and all this new construction, I’d like to announce my candidacy for Town Trustee. Just kidding! Whoo-boy, gotcha! Luckily for us all, I live outside the town limits and therefore cannot run for one of THREE OPEN SEATS this April.

If I did live in town, I would probably have gone around the bend by now. I’d be that middle-aged woman in the same old grey sweater who forgot to wash her hair, ordering an oat-milk cortado to get a crackin start on her day at 11:00am— Oh snap. I am that woman, and while I was busy making other plans, Carbondale has turned out to be my hometown.

Through the years I’ve worked here, played here; loved and lived in this little town at the base of a mountain. I understand that change is the only constant, but there’s something to be said for a thoughtful, listening approach to determining the future of our town. We can encourage smart, sustainable growth over hungry hungry hippo building. We can buzz over the vibrancy as long as we don’t attack our heart: the people and places that keep it Carbondale.

I want to smile as I sail down Main Street, remembering the good ole days while nodding to new ones in the making. I want to watch the Forest Service incorporate healthy, mature trees into their plans for improving the place they live and work. I want to see less dumpster rubble making room for new box-style construction and more reclaimed floorplans with an enhanced view of Mt Sopris, putting the mountain in our little mountain town. Since I can’t run for town council, I guess I’ll just keep writing and posting— or wait! Does P&Z require one to live inside the town limits? Lookout boys, one more Karen comin up! I really hope their meetings don’t start too early…